I love things too!

I feel horrible cause I rant and rant and rant and then I read Holly's blog and she is so sweet and thankful and humble. I love things too. I am grateful for many things too.

I love the Hutchings Christmas Charity soo much! We usually pluck a few angles from the angle tree and buy for them, but it is a much lesser scale. I have talked to my family and we have agreed that this year will be the year of giving. We are going to call Brooklyn's elementary school and talk to the office about a family that could use even groceries or toys etc and we will have a half way Christmas, to bring the spirit of giving back to our home more then just one day a year. Then at Christmas time Brooklyn has agreed that she doesn't need any more toys or junk this year, she will get a few items that she needs, but all of our Christmas money that we set aside will be for making another families Christmas special.

A few years ago the mortgage company I had been working for went out of business, and I got let go November 4th. I remember that I drove to Holly and Mark's appt on Durango, close to my old office, and sat there and cried. That year I took a job at JCPenny, as jobs in mortgage and banking don't ususally hire that time of year, to make money for a small Christmas for everyone. I had relied on help from my ward at the time also for a little bit of help. I remember feeling soo sad and how was I going to tell Brooklyn at 5 years old that Santa Clause was too poor this year. I did the best that I could. Then on December 13th at 11:00 at night someone banged on my door. Brooklyn was in bed and I was on the couch talking to my friend Amber, the neighbor hood I lived in was scary at night so I was hesitant to open the door, I hollered "Who is it?" several times over and no one answered. I cracked the door open my heart racing 100 beats a minute and no one was there, I looked down on the ground and there was a note and 2 gifts. I don't remember what the gift was, but the note apologized for starting the 12 days of Christmas late, I was soo happy it was fun, the note also stated that they wished to remain anonymous, I had windows all around my apartment and could have easily seen who it was running in either direction, but choose to honor their wish. So every night till Christmas Eve I would wait up and promised Brooklyn that I would wake her up when the secret santa came, we got spoiled I thought. We got Christmas decorations, an Entertainment book, PJs, Ornaments, candy, movies, snacks, books, I was feeling so thankful and soo blessed. It was awesome my friends would call every night and ask what my secret santa had done for me that night, it was such a wonderful feeling. Not wanting to break their request for anonymity but wanting them to know we were thankful we drew a big picture and Thank You not on the sidewalk, it was our way of letting them know when they came by every night that we were saying "Thank You!" Then Christmas eve came. I don't know what I was expecting - but the door bell rang I waited several minutes before I answered.
Brooklyn standing by my side we opened the front door and I just broke down and cried. My front patio was covered in Christmas presents! Tons and tons of gifts. That nights card asked us not to open until Christmas Day, but who could do that? We opened them up and as I did I cried and cried. I was soo blessed and soo grateful for someones kindness! Brooklyn got a bike and the Barbie Happy Family set, house, dolls, cars everything plus many more things. They even gave me gifts, I was expecting it to be all for Brooklyn but they thought of me too a dvd player, a necklace, and cash to help with the bills! In my estimate it was well over $1200.00 spent on us! I have a good idea of who it was that was so kind to us that year, I never got to thank that family personally so instead I always said when I can do that financially I would thank them by giving someone else that same gift. They were so selfless and kind and it has blessed my life ever since, I will always remember that feeling of gratitude that I had during those 11 days.
So this is my year for paybacks! I hope to touch someone the way that I was touched.

So as I sat here righting this I cried, the feeling is so much still there. I am excited about our year of giving to others and not ourselves.

Holly's celeb look a likes

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Ever notice that Holly even when she is being weird looking is still freakishly hot? Pam Anderson? Angelina Jolie? Holy crap Holly walk tall and proud today!!

Hahaha

SO SORRY BLOG STALKERS

HAHAHA SORRY HOLLY!

I haven't blogged lately because I really don't have a ton going on right now. Well nothing that I feel really comfortable blogging about, never know who reads these things...ya know!

I am tired a grumpy some ole same ole. We had an insemination 2 Sundays ago AFC/NFC playoffs. I feel good about the timing of this insemination. Rita took my class, all 13 of them (yes I said 13!!), Don and I took in our sample, went to breakfast went back to get the drip on. Then we came home and it was football games, good ones too, and adult activities all day - had to keep the count up and alive, good thing Brooklyn was at church with Rita! Based on the amount of pressure I was feeling I think my egg burst around 2 o'clock so with the insemination happening at 9am we are in our 6 hour optimal window. I don't want to be falsely hopeful either, but you can't help but to be you know.

So when I was asking Rita to take my class I told her that if I got knocked up that weekend it was because she was willing to take my primary class for me and so I would name my child boy or girl Rita Consuelo Carter Heath Stepro, after her. Then I was talking to Stacie and she reminded me that since the Bears won their game and I am rooting for Chicago in the big game and I hopefully conceived on the day of the game I should name my kid Lovie Smith, So then we were talking even more and I threw her name in the mix too with Kay, then I said that I would name my son after which ever QB wins the big game. Rex or Peyton, for that reason I am hoping that the Colts win! Haha so anyway the name Peyton has grown on me the last 2 weeks. So if we are pregnant then my child will be named Rita Consuelo Carter Heath Lovie Smith Peyton Kay Stepro! Hahahaha Fun and games fun and games.

I will take a pee test on Superbowl Sunday, blood test on the following Monday. I will know by 4:00 Monday afternoon if we got lucky this month.

The timning just seemed to be all right, Don was home all day, which I love to have him home and at church on Sunday. My Sundays are completely different when we go to church together. His boss is being evil again and told him that he will be back on Sundays again. Long story, but she is evil!

Last Friday I bought our tickets to go see Wicked while we are in Chicago. It is Don's first off-Broadway show before so he let me buy the expensive seats! I downloaded the soundtrack on Itunes so that we could get familiar with the music.

Still not really working, trying my best to be a Real Estate Agent just having a hard time with my broker, clients and myself. Again the usual. I just don't like not feeling like I don't know what I am doing.

Mom and Grandma and maybe Shauna are coming up for Time our for Women in March, I am excited about that. Rita invited her mom also so it should be a fun and uplifting weekend. Michael Mclain and S. Michael Wilcox, Mary Ellen Edmunds and Cherie Call will be there, a few others too - just don't remember them all. Don't be jealous...just kidding!

My master bathroom is still all torn apart. We had to fire our crappy contractors and are doing the work ourselves now, on Don's days off - so we are back on the "kitchen" remodeling schedule again! Groovy! I love having only 1 tub and toilet for everyone! I hope that it is finished before we start getting company, otherwise that will suck royally!

I am not always a complete grouch!! I promise. Tired and Cranky!!

ICE SKATING!

Brooklyn and Aria
EYE yi yi! The sun was in my eyeball!
It was sunshine and roses all day, Brooklyn did take a hard fall and hit her head.

Brooklyn had to get all gussied up for ice skating! Purple eyeshadow and glitter! She is ready for her triple lutz!
Look at Don! Ahhh! He never fell one time!
Brooklyn and Aria.... on the ice!
Brooklyn did soo good! She fell a few times but it was all ok! She got the hang of it pretty easy!

Don, Brooklyn and I met up with Rita and her girls and Jenn and her girls at the Rink on the River, it is an ice rink that sits right next to the Truckee River, it is a cute location.

Don and Brooklyn both did REALLY REALLY well for their first time skating! It was fun! Rita is such a good mom, she skated several laps hunched over skating with Bailey, makes you feel like crap because you won't go out their with your kids!

My pictures are not the best, we had the sun right in our face so I was trying my best.

Evan & Mario

I am a jerk!

We got home from Turlock and I don't have any good pictures of Evan! We had tons of video of Evan though, but we lost it all because we were not recording it in the right setting!

So we do have more nephews not just Holly's kids!

random pictures

I love Holly!
Kyle was done for the day, ready for sleep
Brooklyn and Jaren playing Princess Monopoly
I took the choney picute down ...but this one was equally funny!
Brooklyn's eyeball, you wouldn't believe how many of these eyeball pictures I have!

This group of pictures is from our airplane on the way to Vegas, Brooklyn took all the pictures except the one of herself. There are pictures of Lake Mead and then the one of the houses and stuff is Section 27, you can see Dooley (her old school) and the park, Brooklyn thought that it was cool to see it from the plane!

This group of Brooklyn and I getting ready for my Century 21 Christmas Party. Next is Don all handsome and stuff going to my Christmas party. Isn't he a handsome devil??

The next few are Brooklyn getting ready for her Christmas Dance/Acrobatics recital. And Aria and Bailey & Brooklyn at the recital.

Thanks Chanel!

I am a myspace voyuer so I know all about the stalking!
I appreciate your advice! I think that I will look more into those retreats in a little bit, I just booked our Chicago vaca and Don kinda frowns when I book 2 big vacations! haha
You are a good friend and I promised Holly I wouldn't friend steal!
But I welcome your advise and help and support anytime!

Fun in the cold

As I told you all in the previous rant it was cold! The picture up above is the temp!! When we woke up at 9:00am and it was -1! Negative one!!! Holy Crap so what do you do on a Saturday when it is Below Freezing cold?? We met up with Rita and her girls plus Montana at the children's museum and hung out there for a few hours and then took them to McDonalds and let them play there for a few hours. By the time we got home it was after 4:00 and had warmed up to 20 degrees. That was nice hahaha, it is like Vegas if the summer, after 100 degrees one more doesn't really matter - below 20 it doesn't really matter!

Tomorrow (Monday) we are going ice skating, well not me of course for the obvious reasons...um pretty much I can't walk with out hurting myself!

But I will have some cute pictures for sure!

We went to church today, it was really really good. This is Don's second week in a row with Sundays off, it is so good to have him home all day, Sunday is literally the only day that we don't do ANYTHING so it is good to have him home and I am sure he feels relaxed one day a week! :)

I had 11 kids in my primary class, including Brooklyn, today and I actually had good control today, it was a good lesson, and I didn't leave hating my calling. I loved it today, it was weird, I have been complaining about not feeling spiritually edified and today I felt edified. Of course I am mid Clomid cycle too, so I am feeling a bit more emotional then normal! But I felt very very good today, I can last another week!

TTYL

Pity Party - Party of One!

As I have been open about thus far, we have been doing fertility treatments. We have not been protecting for almost a year "trying" for 10 months, trying using Clomid for 8 months - actually only 7 with Clomid since I had to take November off due to a cyst, and trying using Clomid, FSH shot, and HCG shot & artificial insemination for 1 month - this month will be the second.
My body hates me for this! I am tired, I am cranky(-er then normal), I am a hairy beast!!, my body is bloated all of the time, I ache, did I mention that I am ornry too - and my Physicians Assistant said that many women gain 30-40 pounds while going through this stuff, because of emotional eating plus all of the jacking with the various hormones. And we got a $1,000.00 lab bill this week for the lab work that I had last month. The inseminations are 5,000- 6,000 - we were ready for that, we just were not ready for all this other stuff.

And with every passing month it gets closer to my 30th b-day. I am not sure if I want to have kids after I turn 30.

I want more kids, at least one, but you know when you know that the boy/girl you have a crush on isn't interested in you and so then you start making up reasons that you didn't really like him anyways...just so you feel better about yourself? Well, that is where I am at with this fertility stuff. I am just not sure that this is what the Lord wants for us? If he wanted us to get pregnant - then we would. So is this a lesson in accepting the Lord's time? or a sign that this isn't whats in store for us? Maybe I am thinking too much about it - as I do most things.
Maybe the reason that I was not supposed to give Brooklyn up for adoption 9 years ago is because the Lord new that she was my only shot? I don't know? I don't know?

I am only doing this 2 maybe 3 more months before we call it quits for a while. Our next tentative insemination will be the 23rd of January - and we will not find out if it works for 2 weeks after that.

Hmmm whatelse can I rant about while I am here?

It is cold! Down to 10 degrees now and it's only 7:12! I made homemade chicken noodle soup (with homemade noodles) tonight for dinner, it sounded like a good cold weather food. It was good.

Naleah

Ricky (Don's son) dropped by a picture of Naleah for Christmas the other day, she is so dang cute! And a picture of their family. It seems that they are very happy. I know that Ricky loves Naleah with all of his heart and it is very endearing to see him with her. Don't you just love love love that picture of Naleah's picture is Santa's Hands? I think that it is adorable!

It's Cold!

We have been having such nice weather this winter, nice due to global warming, but nice none the less. Then this week we got more snow! UGH! Not a bunch a few inches, but along with it we are getting much colder this week. We may very likely hit ZERO or just about! YIKES!! I am glad that will be on the weekend and I won't have to drive.

When I got home today from Century 21 it was 19 by the time I took a picture it was 18 and now I am looking and it is a warm 17! It's only 1:30! It is snowing again outside now, it is very pretty to watch coming down when you are safe and warm in doors.

I really like this area, to bad this area doesn't like me! hahaha

I bought Jaren and Kyle some snow clothes, anticipating their visit! I can't wait for them to come and visit us! I love having company! I love having friends! As you can tell, I am just trying to figure out how all of this works still, my pictures are all a little screwy!

Bathroom

Here are the pictures of the first bathroom. It was pain to get it finished but it is and here are the pictures of the front bathroom.

There is a ton of stuff in this bathroom in these pictures because the master bathroom is currently under construction and so we have all of all of our stuff in this one, so it is a bit cluttered.

Again if you saw what this was before....you can totally appreciate it now!

kITCHEN

Here are some pitcures of our kitchen. For those of you who saw it gutted or saw it before, you will not even recongnize it! It is beautiful! I love it! It is my favorite room in the house.


I love seeing my ideas coming together and looking very pretty! Don was the labor behind it all. I would hold the cabinets and he would screw them in, Ricky helped a couple of times as well as the missionaries when they stopped by for dinner.

We still have work to do in there like painting the ceilings, baseboards and buying a black fridge. But at least there is no more gaping hole in the floor and it is completely functional!!

Very Sad Day

After Brooklyn got home from Vegas on the 2nd we went to Turlock, Ca to visit Don's family and to see a hockey game....oh wait... not just any hockey game or any hockey team. Oh no, it was the REDWINGS!! They were playing in San Jose. I enjoyed the warm ups, and then the first period when we were beating the Sharks, but then out of no where we blow our 3 point lead and it is downhill quickly from there. Final score was 9 to 4!! We got creamed! This was more disappointing then the Yankee game we saw! I thought that I was going to get into a fight with some jerk fans because they kept taunting me and Brooklyn, but I didn't. We stayed and cheered for our team to the bitter bitter end. I don't remember much else about our trip to Turlock, to busy wallowing in my own self pity. Not Really!

We had a really good time! We played games with Jeff and Julie and Brooklyn loves playing with Evan. He is so funny, he talks a lot and he is not even 2! Once I figure out how to place the pictures in the spot I want them to be life will be better! hahaha